Supposed to end work at 6.30pm today, but instead I was in the restaurant from opening till closing . . . Doing free labour from 6.30 onwards, priceless labour I should say . . . Lol.
I did it willingly, without anyone asking me to stay, it's just that . . . . . I don't know.
Maybe I'm just dumb, heh. But I'm happy about it, no doubt . . .
Or maybe I'm just an asshole all these while trying to make things so hard, difficult.
I will feel guilty at times, that I'm just a fucking hypocrite . . . Hypocrisy, from jealousy ?
Causing all these . . . Confusion, antagonism, desperation . . .
Is this just part of the whole play ? Will I ever get to show my light, rather than all these darkness at the end ? Or will all these troubles cause a load of, painful catastrophe ?
Happiness is on one end, but it's causing the other end to feel more panic and desperate. And when the other end was having happiness, this end's miserable . . . Why must it be this way ?
The reason, I'm the one to blame. If I'd never existed, or should I say . . . If I'd never start pulling the other end of the thread, and cause and provocation, and intimidation, and . . . Ah fuck, it's just repetition . . . Happiness is just the facial outlook, but behind it is full of . . . Fucking crap .
Cut short, I'm happy and afraid . . .
I'm just spouting rubbish all over the place . . . . . .
Happy 73rd Birthday to my lovely grandfather (:
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